I believe in love as much as the next person, but we must approach relationships with some logic and practicality. Breakups can be ugly, confusing, and downright devastating. I think the best thing to do is to approach him (at a time when you two arent fighting) and tell him that when he threatens to break up with you, it hurts you. If youre constantly trying to get him to take you back, hell think youre desperate and it will turn him off even more. Or maybe he knows what real love feels like and simply doesnt feel it for you anymore. I know it does not feel like it right now, but the bottom line is that cultural differences can be difficult to get over unless both parties are really committed to doing just that. This is really very disappointing. Even though they like you, and it is perfectly permissible to marry a Christian woman, if he is dependent on them, that could be extremely difficult. Dude is an amazing guy. As she explains what shes endured, however, her decision to break things off seems valid. He seemed like he had true feelingshe would message everyday without fail etc.but I just don't know. I always agreed but there was something that stopped us everytime. Everytime I offered salah,I used to make dua that Allah would pleaseshow us the right path (because deep inside I knew it was wrong). He doesnt support LGBTQ+ rights and has a profound dislike for the Jewish people. Please dont judge my lesbian relationship. Am I too young to marry her? I love him, too. She got copies of the court order made, and went home to her family. Dont constantly text, call, or message him on social media, even if it seems like hes forgotten about you. If he feels like youre not interested in him anymore and are moving on with your life if he feels like he cant have you hell want you even more. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Mar 1, 2023 at 11:38 AM. ", Reader Response: My Muslim Boyfriend Broke Up with Me. 3. How willI improve my relationship with Allah? So, he has to break up with you to be able to see where it goes with the other person. Muslim Gogglebox star Jad Nehmetallah has issued a stern response to Reuban Kaye, after the comedian made a lewd joke about Jesus while appearing on The Let me just start off by saying that I can understand this predicament all too well. Everyone has experiences with love, and everyone needs dating advice, so giving these topics more attention and spreading the word means a lot to her. When he sees that you have your life together and that hes no longer the center of it, hell want to get back with you even more. If this is the case, you will soon find out about it because hell probably be in a new relationship in no time and likely already knows who his new girlfriend is going to be. Its also known as the Silent treatment or Cold turkey method. This can create problems in your life and your relationships. If you make snide remarks or say anything negative about her, youll only drive him further away. Islam knows people have urges, but there are only ways for us to do it that's right. She's that desperate for him. An ending of a relationship can come naturally, and both partners can be aware of that, even if one of them wishes that it wasnt true. Assalaamu alaikum We broke up because we realized that our relationship was haram. You want more, and he was happy with the way things were. As for information about Islam, I would suggest that you look up Dr. Zakir Naik on youtube and listen to his lectures. I dont think i can do this without him. Perhaps you were fighting a lot. A Work Boyfriend Will Mess With Your Relationship (Cut It Out! Even if you really like each other, you might not be compatible enough to have a serious relationship, and he accepted that before you did. Still take this as a lesson for your love life, be careful who you date. When you feel that sadness within you, when you are disturbed and frustrated, when anxiety surrounds you, say Astaghfirullah You also get a chance to focus on yourself and learn what you need to do to get your life back on track. A lot of times, they end up in a broken relationship with little or no communication between the two of you. Also to find out if he's the one pray istikhara and ask Allh for his guidance and he will show you if he is meant to be. You should also avoid seeing them in person because this will make keeping the no contact rule a lot harder. He and his ex will only continue to hurt you. And thats probably a good thing when you think about it. did he break up after you had sex with him? I know he won't marry me. Its not over til the Trumpet is Blown Sin and Repentance in Islam, The Sin of Fornication and Adultery Part 1, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 2, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 3. When a man leaves abruptly and out of nowhere, it might simply be because he got cold feet. If the two of you still want to be together, why not have him approach your family to propose marriage - that way you and your family can consider the proposal, decide if he truly is the man you wish to marry, and if he is then you can get married, inshaAllah. Its totally wrong. Dating Again After A Breakup: How Long Should You Wait? I don't want the relationship back. Talking to a counselor and then connecting with some friends. Since yesterday all i did was cry. He is a Muslim and as such has different authority and different values and different morals and ways of looking at things. Your ex will likely be confused and hurt by your decision. This will make it difficult for you to get back together with him. Its because he is control and you werent mutually in to each other. After a while, if you still want him back, you can reach out to him again. They say the dua made at tahajjud is like an arrow that doesn't miss its target. THIS IS TO BRING TO YR KIND NOTICE WHAT IS A PRAYER TO GOD ALMIGHTY THE SUPREME ONE TRUE GOD WE CALL ALLAH IN ARABIC-WHO IS THE ONLY AUTHORITY TO FORGIVE REST IS ALL DELUSION AND FALSE GODS WHO ARE HIS CREATURES WHOM PEOPLE HAVE REVERED SO MUCH AND EXAGGERATED THAT THEY HAVE GIVEN THE PARTNERSHIP WITH HIM IN HIS GOD HEAD- Even when we were in relationship, he used to tell me that we should break up as he used to feel guilty of this. The bottom line is that your friends will be there for you when you need a shoulder to cry on when youre heartbroken they will be there for you no matter what so cherish them. Surprisingly, a man can simply not have the time and energy for a girlfriend! They can offer advice and share their own experiences. That's not the guy that I knew. This isn't because there's anything wrong with you; it's because he was a user not a lover.Also, mature or not your response to his message was apt. You want to casually bring up the good old days. Mar 1, 2023 at 11:38 AM. We talked about , me becoming Muslim for him in the past. They dated and eventually married. See if hell be the one who reaches out to you. An yeah i dont want anybody too. There is no problems. Doing so will only make him think youre desperate and clingy and hell resent you for it. Speaking of commitment, have you discussed where your relationship is going? Tell him you want to be his friend, but youre not ready for a relationship. When someone breaks up with you, it can hurt so much that you want them back without even giving it much thought. Even today we love each other a lot. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Guess Who? That's a lot of presumptions that you are making. Mother will not let me become a commerical pilot because I am a girl! Yeah I don't get this side to him. Hey its wrong to think that fate cant be changed. agde, I think you have misunderstood the purpose of this website. With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice tailored to your unique situation. If he rejects you and gives you vague and short answers while youre texting, you should probably give up. Examine what went wrong in your relationship and how you can improve so that things go better the next time around. The truth is, you cant get over him if hes constantly there, even if just in your feeds. Press J to jump to the feed. There were probably some signs that he was thinking about breaking up with you that you might have neglected to notice. Make things easier for yourself and establish the no contact rule so that you can move on. Don't do it so God will give you a man who does respect you enough to marry you. You need to stop assuming everyone is having sex!!! Hope this helps. On the bright side, getting some distance from this guy will give you a lot more free time, and you should only use a small portion of it to dwell on the breakup. WebThis blog is managed by the content creator and not GhanaWeb, its affiliates, or employees. If you are interested in Islam only convert because YOU WANT TO. Since then, he broke up with me, starting seeing his ex girlfriend, and is now treating me coldly like as if I never existed and like he never even had feelings for me. Well think of it this way. A woman I grew up with fell in love in college with a non-practicing Muslim. Im not muslim but I know a fair few now. And then also say Inshallah, or "if Allah wills", and not hold Love as your God to making it happen. NowI don't even want to make any dua. It only seems that way because they dont explain themselves. I don't care less anymore either". We use to cry for each other when either of us had any problem . Say: "He is the One God: God the Eternal, the Uncaused Cause of All Being. I dont know he came back to me the other day saying he is finalizing his divorce and he wants us to be together but I dont believe in anything i am honest but he probably misses the sex but i am not more his sex doll that is how i feel now after 1 year with him. If your ex-boyfriend broke up with you, you need to let him take his time to heal and figure out what he wants in life. Well you did a great thing by breaking up with him. You might be able to get your boyfriend back regardless of the current situation, but you need to give it some time and let your boyfriend have his space. I know it hurts, but it would probably hurt more later. But when you break up, your friends will be there for you. A modern agnostic woman older than the man and a devoted muslim family is, Sorry to read this. I wish to leave my cheating husband and take the children with me, Used, manipulated, gaslighted, and then left by a man, Family dysfunction has resulted in a scarcity of suitable marriage proposals. Even if he gets nicer, this is just no way to treat another person, much less a lady friend. But first, lets find out why he broke up with you in the first place. If you immediately start trying to get him to take you back, hes going to think youre desperate and push you away even more. Whether youre still in love with him and truly believe there is a future for the two of you, or you accept that its over but need someone to talk to about the breakup, an experienced relationship expert could be just what you need. Let us see the benefits and virtues of reciting this simple beautiful supplication insha Allah. Its likely that your ex will be more drawn to you than before. Grieve your loss. Maybe he just used you, and once he got what he wanted, he left. My boyfriend and I were in a relationship for almost 2 and a half years. He sent her to take classes on how to be a good Muslim wife. I want to avoid adultery. When you were in a relationship, it was easy to blame your breakup on external factors. Be glad you discovered the walking red flag he was before you got even more involved, and don't try to rationalize why he is so cold now because the truth is, he was likely that cold from the beginning and his "sweet" personality toward you was a performative act all along. How can I be a better Muslim? That is a big sin and not allowed in the religion. You want him back, right? You can find it on your own. He reveals the texts you can send and things you can say that will trigger deep feelings inside him. One of the best ways to get your ex-boyfriend back is to show him what hes missing out on. I love my Muslim boyfriend but he already has a wife. If you want to get your ex back, its crucial to understand the real reason behind the breakup. I suggest you visit your local masjid or Islamic Center. If hes from any decent family, the wife is already identified. This is a lesson so try to learn Islamic way of life where Zina (Adultery) is hated the most .It is sinful to engage in sex without marriage . They dont have to be interested in someone else or be bothered by something you do. I was blown away by how kind and empathetic my coach was. Prayers for you too, this sounds like its been hard on you. he may not be ready to get back together. The more you keep worry for him and his new/ old girlfriend in your heart, the harder it will be for you. My brother is gay. Save your dignity and dont chase after a man who doesnt want you, even if you think that hes the most amazing man in the world. If youre not ready for a serious relationship, dont get back together with him and lead him on. Now that it has become clear that your relationship cant move forward, he figured that its better to end it and find someone he could grow old with. Giphy. Dont sit at home feeling sad and lonely. Why has no one talked about the matter of teachers messing with students? This is in may ways an excellent thing you have been spared having a husband who puts his parents ahead of you. One day we both decided we will part ways for the sake of Allh and In Shaa 'Allaah if it is meant to be Allh will reunite us. But doing something quick and rash might not be the best idea for you at this moment. Now I don't know what to do. It sounds like he's moving on; it would help you to do the same. He needs to marry you, that is the only problem. But, its really hard to figure out what went wrong if youre still in touch with your ex. A life suitable for Islam can be experienced all ", "I congratulate you. A TikToker revealed the most savage way to break up with a boyfriend: Post it on BeReal. But, If he sees that youre not jealous, hell wonder whats going on and hell want to win you back. OP: I guess maybe he is feeling too painful in front of the God? ! Breaking up with him was the hardest and most painful. Istighfar opens the door of sustenance. If your ex-boyfriend is still in love with you, these tips will help him see that being with you is the best decision hell ever make. Does Islam allow this? Do what you need to do to mourn this ending relationship. In the end, you cant rely on him to give you closure. It will help you understand what went wrong: If you and your ex broke up for whatever reason, you need to understand why it happened. My boyfriend andI werein a relationship for almost 2 and a half years. She explained all that happened to her and how she escaped. Shes a foodie who loves to cook. Doing so will only make you look desperate, and you dont want to do anything to jeopardize your chances of getting back together. I'm still getting over it and he now is ignoring me. He might be overwhelmed with everything thats going on, and youre only amplifying the stress. Youll have to try to find out on your own. This will help you mourn and it will help him come to terms with his decision. I dont know if that'll ever happen. I just want his kind nature back. Dont get me wrong, every relationship comes with its own healthy dose of arguments and awkwardness. But there are still certain things that youd only know if youre not Muslim, and youre in a relationship with someone who is Islam doesnt permit drinking alcohol, so those 2-4-1 cocktails quickly become 2-4-YOU, which has its pros and cons. She couldn't leave the country. My boyfriend and I had been dating since Sept 2018.he confessed to me he loved me and we lasted unto our six months in april. I want no one but him. Honestly I have heard several stories of Muslims guys doing this. When we hadour last talk he told me,"you complete your course, and I will complete mine, and after that we will marry". WebMy boyfriend broke up with me yesterday because i'm im an Atheist and hes a muslim. If it matters so much to him, in the long run it would still have been a deal breaker. Are my stepsisters feelings and actions justified? Think about his previous relationships, how serious they were, and why they ended. , If he truly loves u ,nothing will stop him from marrying you. In islam there is no IFs and Else .Zina is not allowed .Full stop . They granted an immediate divorce and full legal permanent custody of her children. The same day he broke up with me saying he's very sorry and didn't want this to happen. Who will love you unconditionally and deserves you? I've been with her 5 years and she ended it. But, your ex will see this desperation and it will probably push them further away from you. Also reciting it for my my marriage. Its not what you want to hear, but it gives him a very good reason not to tell you the truth doesnt it? You may want to try. Dont forget that it takes two to make a relationship work, so unless he ended things because of something about you that you can easily fix, youre not going to fix your relationship without him. Don't spend money in a big ceremony if you cannot, you don't need to. Whereas you considered him an equal and his religious beliefs as valid as yours. You need to play it cool. I did the same thing and we almost had the same story sister. Dont worry. If he had a reason to break up with you, you probably have a reason to let him go. Focus on the negative things about him and your relationship, and dont let yourself crave something that didnt make you happy in the first place. Your boyfriend might be in a casual mood regarding your relationship, and he got into it just for fun. Occupy your time and give it some time. Don't get back with him. *****, https://www.reddit.com/r/CatholicDating/comments/shtjf3/how_do_i_convince_my_muslim_boyfriend_that/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share. He probably has a good reason to think that you cant grow old together, so put your feelings aside and look at your relationship realistically. If your ex rejects you when you reach out to him, you should know that thats all he is now your ex, and thats okay. It's not like the girl doesn't love the guy in this case right? If your ex-boyfriend broke up with you, you need to let him take his time to heal and figure out what he wants in life. Today he asked me not to message him anymore and said he doesn't careto which I "maturely" replied back "don't worry, I won't. I am not muslim, but my boyfriend is muslim. She said "NO". In his mind, things arent going to be the same again, and they will somehow get worse. The No contact rule gives them the space they need to get over the breakup. He just thinks that its time for him to be with someone new. my ex bf is from Iraq and we met and had a wonderful relationship..i said we had because after one year i discovered he had a wife and a son in iraq and came to america saying he is single and we had sex and even lived together in an apartment..i am so sad disappointment i trusted him but he is a liar and a player..why he says he is muslim? People like that (women arent immune) will keep pulling in old love interests because of selfish means. At first glance, the speaking to someone via RelationshipHero.com, discussed where your relationship is going, chat online to one of the experts from Relationship Hero, 11 Tips To Move On From A Relationship Without Closure, 15 Sad Signs Your Partner Wants To Break Up With You, 14 Fundamental Reasons Why Relationships Fail: Common Causes Of Breakups, How Long Does It Take To Get Over A Breakup? In the end he took her passport, she basically became a prisoner there. I knew he was about to break up with me. WebIf you are a non-Muslim and have a Muslim boyfriend, then yes, you should breakup with him, unless he agrees to leave Islam. IslamicAnswers.com Staff Photo Gallery. Before doing anything else, think about the possible reason for his odd behavior and trust your gut. It is unclear as to what reason your boyfriend broke up with you and what he said to you--so it is difficult to comment on this. CanI see my boyfriend's pictures whenI miss him? He was the one keeping me alive. This time i don't tell him my reason why I am brokeup. But, theyre a natural part of life. I love my Muslim boyfriend but he already has a wife. We sit on the same highschool. What if your relationship was going great? Perhaps the brother realized that he shouldn't be doing this--perhaps he didn't, either way, it isn't my place to judge him on it except to say he did the right thing based solely on the information given. Unfortunately, one of the possible explanations for your boyfriends behavior is that he stopped loving you. This morning when I settled in at my computer to get some work done, I found this letter from a reader. I pray that God guides me I'm just lost. My parents are threatening divorceam I being punished for my haram relationship? Its sad, but it happens all the time. It's not your job to fix him. I'm sorry. We have talked about the future before and have always worked things out but suddenly he doesnt think it will work anymore. I know that he still loves me and cares about me but is trying to shut me out and forget his feelings for me. I know how it hurts. So, write a letter to say goodbye to him, but dont send it. Perhaps he had doubts or felt he was not ready to commit or perhaps there was something he wanted to tell you but never got the chance to say. and im searching for a friend i dont have any friend here:( If he really loves you I believe right now he is praying for you. Maybe yours ended now so that it would hurt less than if it ended later. This can help you get your ex back because hell see the positive changes in you. If you want to heal from a breakup, you cant keep texting your ex, stalking his profile, or even meeting him for coffee to try to convince him to take you back. WebMuslim boyfriend broke up with me The details of our relationship can be seen below. Type: Question Score: 11 Views: 8,026 Replies: 17. Because once you paint a new picture of what your life together could be like, you could end up creating the relationship youve always dreamt of. When he returned to new york with his family.he suddenly told me that he had been wrong and sinned deeply by being in a relationship with me.especially a christian.He loved me but he said he could be friends with me always and respected me dearly..but that as a muslim he cannot marry anyone but a muslim woman.So he had to break up with mei'm truly heart broken because he has been the only man who has ever truly loved me,been honest with me,patient, and i mean i felt enveloped in his love and nowwe no longer can share it together. They had 3 sons together. His parents found him a new girl and Im left devastated. Do something cathartic. You need to be sure of what you want and be able to clearly communicate that to your ex. Question regarding relations between husband and wife. Instead of talking to you about them and seeking your support, he decided to end your relationship so that he could dedicate his time and energy to those things. Blaming, shaming, and slandering your ex wont help you get him back. This will make him regret breaking up with you and want to get back together. You are precious and created by God. Since then, he broke up with me, starting seeing his ex girlfriend, and is now treating me If you stay in contact with them, they wont have a chance to heal properly. I tried to ask him for the reason, but he never tells me why. Did you know that exercising boosts your self-confidence and makes you feel better about yourself? My dua was accepted and we broke up because his sister caught him havingthe relationship. Unfortunately, though, your boyfriend might never tell you the truth. While he still loves you, he may be in the position of choosing between you and his family. Many time i tried to brokeup with them but my heart get melt after talking with him when he say's you are hurting me. But maybe it wasn't the love of your life, just another lesson of life. When it stopped being fun or causal, he figured he should leave. Did you have a bad fight that you havent recovered from? This will only make him resent you and he may become less likely to get back together with you later on. Does Islam allow this? This is especially true if you have been having problems in your relationship, even if those problems seem minor to you. That is such a heartless way to treat you. Advertising on this blog requires a minimum of GH50 a week. Careers Workplace and Religion Columnists, Recreation Outdoors and Religion Columnists, Religious Music and Entertainment Columnists, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Dahlia Qadri, Intern, Hijab and International ". You were always only ever a bit of fun, a bit of sex and a possession, a non Muslim possession that had authority over, given to him by his god. Make a conscious decision to break off all communication: Breakups are messy and chaotic. If he trusts you, he may confide in you about any problems he has in his new relationship. How should our family approach this? Your boyfriend might have had a change of heart, or there were problems in your relationship that drove him away. Sudden breakups usually arent so sudden. Dont let yourself be lured into checking his social media accounts or sending him frequent emails or texts remember the no contact rule. I'm just hurt while happy just hurt. This is enough time for everything to settle down, and by then youll both know if youve made the right choice or if you have regrets. Perhaps you were dating a religious girl or Now is the time to reflect on what you want and what went wrong. I am 40 years old and what I dislike so much is people dont take me seriously when I say I dont have sex without commitment is like people think I am joking.. He will then just sit and wait, wondering when it's going to happen. He might be expecting to feel the same emotions he felt during the early stages of dating when everything was new and exciting. My Soon-to-be-wife has left me suddenly, And I am still deeply in love with her. Instead, its important to put some space between the two of you so that both of you can think clearly about your relationship and figure out what went wrong. Study Islam. Still not sure what to do about the ending of your relationship? I am sure he is not getting married. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. He begets not, and neither is He begotten; and there is nothing that could be compared with Him. I know it can be messy but this will be the kindest way for YOU. If he loved you once, he can love you again and you can make him realize that. Do you want different things in life? You may want to try speaking to someone via RelationshipHero.com for empathetic, specific, and genuinely insightful relationship advice at its most convenient. Im so glad youve reached out. He hears us all, and grants us what is best for us. recite it and yul get what you want inshallah. To walk among the What is Khalwa? Give him time to think about the relationship and his decision to break up with you. Must be XYZ" etc then I am happy for them. I want toforget him, butI don't know how. Even though you and your boyfriend might get back together, you might not, and its best to accept the current reality. Your closure doesnt have to be some dramatic Goodbye, but having something like that can help you close that chapter of your life. Sometimes, the answer is simple, even if we dont want to hear it. Go out with your friends, go to parties, focus on your career and make new friends. Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world. Or if he just never had much feelings for me and was using me to make ex jealous. Either way, he just cant make himself love you. What you are saying is not Muslim men it is Middle Eastern culture. Ana Vakos enjoys writing about love and all the problems that come with it.